Here are some of the weirdest things that are illegal in Australia

By Alexander Pan December 17, 2018

No.3 is something we can ALL agree on!

For a country as laidback and chilled as Australia is, you'd think that our laws would reflect the people's demeanour.

As it turns out, that's not quite the case.

Many, many laws have come and gone in the two hundred or so years we've been a country, some of which are incredibly strange.

While most of the outdated ones are now (rightfully) scratched, there are still some laws that make little to no sense.

So without further ado, here are a bunch of weird things that are illegal in Australia. Be warned, you will raise your eyebrows at least a couple of times at a few of these.

1. Porn

That's right, it turns out your favourite past time is quite illegal. Well, illegal in certain circumstances. 

Pornos are rated X18+ and X18+ films can only be legally exhibited or sold in the ACT or NT. Explains why those adult stores everywhere are so discreet then.

On top of all that, porn is also not allowed on the internet in Australia. Good luck trying to enforce that one!

2. Tackling pigeons

Apparently pigeon tackling happens enough that there needs to be laws to protect them.

Well the reality is that these laws came in at a time when pigeons were used as handy communication devices and thus needed protecting.

Pigeons are considered pests nowadays but it is still illegal in South Australia and Victoria for anyone to kill, injury, or take any homing pigeons.

3. Bad music

Music taste is a bit of a subjective thing but it appears the Northern Territory takes music a bit more seriously than the rest of us.

While you need a permit to busk anywhere, there's also a $200 in store for all those terrible NT musicians and buskers who "play musical instruments so as to annoy". That's right, you basically get fined if you're a terrible musician.

Sadly, there is no law to ban all those musicians who bust out "Wonderwall" covers.

4. Dressing up as Batman and Robin

We can all agree that the Batman & Robin film was the worst one in the series by far, but in Australia, it appears that some lawmaker hated the caped crusder and his trusty sidekick so much that it is actually illegal to dress like the two superheroes.

There goes that potential Halloween costume then.

5. Swearing

Australia may be known as a country that's quite easy-going in the use of swearing every day - to the point where the c-word is colloquialised - but the law is actually pretty strict in terms of cussing.

Every Australian jurisdiction has laws against "offensive language" in public, though what actually constitutes as "offensive language" depends on the context and culture.

What this means is that calling someone the f-word in a racially charged manner is very illegal while telling right-wing politicians to "f**k off" is okay.

6. Fortune-telling

We're big fans of all things to do with star signs, but that is about the limit to it law-wise in some areas in Australia.

In the Northern Territory and South Australia, fortune-telling and mediumship is illegal as it is considered to be fraud (rightfully so).

The penalty isn't just a fine and a slap on the wrist either. Offenders will get it hit with a $10k fine or two years in jail.

We're willing to bet no fortune-teller or medium saw that one coming.

7. Children aren't allowed to buy alcohol, cigarettes, or condoms... but they can use/consume them

It's no surprise that Australia doesn't let children buy alcohol, cigarettes, or condoms because, well, they got no use for that sort of stuff.

With that logic, it seems like lawmakers left it there and didn't bother to finish off that train of thought because it actually isn't illegal for children to use/consume all those aforementioned three things.

Keep an eye out on your things, parents.

8. Wearing black clothes, felt shoes, and black shoe polish on your face

The reason this odd law exists is because wearing all that stuff makes you look like a burgler.

We prefer to think that it makes you look like the world's worst ninja, which in itself deserves to be illegal anyway.